MUSEO DE JAMON by Heidi Johnson-Wright

MUSEO DE JAMON by Heidi Johnson-Wright

They hang from above by the score, like art deco ornamentation, with their curved lines and rounded dimensions. But these delicious objects are hardly mere window dressing. In fact, they are the headliners, the stars of the show.

They are hams.

Not “hams” in the overwrought, scenery-chewing, Rod Steiger school of acting sense. Literal hams. Savory hams, flavorful and enticing. Hams that make you forget all previous ham-tasting life experiences. Hams that make El Museo del Jamon -- the Jam Museum – a destination restaurant.

Oh, sure, they will tell you, you can find restaurants and cafes that serve quality ham all over Madrid . Perfectly good ham, in fact. But those other places lack the ambiance and the showmanship of the Museo.

Step through the doorway and you’ll sense immediately that this is a special place where local suit-clad businessmen, Japanese student backpackers and working class Madrilenos can enjoy a shared love of the pig.

Once you get past the initial urge to stare at all of those divine dangling beauties encircling the place, your eye is drawn to the show’s supporting cast: the vest-clad waiters that work from the massive square-shaped bar in the middle of the floor.

These are not the vacant “have a nice day” shove your latte and bagel at you servers. These men are showmen from head to toe, who can turn a mere placing an order to an artful and often comedic “call and response.”

Sounds promising, you say. But perhaps you hesitate because you’re looking for a quick bite and don’t want to bother with a sit-down meal. Or maybe your Spanish is rather rusty. Not to worry.

Travelers on a budget will be pleased to discover that many of the items on the menu are very affordable. Patrons who choose table service can head to the adjacent dining room and pay for the privilege. Stick to eating at the bar or at one of the stand up tables nearby and you pay less. Plus, you have a ringside seat to the action.

Ordering is made easier by pointing, if necessary, to photos of dishes displayed from above. And even if your Spanish stinks, you can surely memorize the word jamon.

And that is, of course, the all-important reason folks come here in the first place.

Whether it’s a dish made from Serrano (traditional bone-in ham, hung up to cure for 14 months), or Iberico (infused with the flavor of acorn, the food of these black-hoofed beauties), you’ll wonder you ever wasted one blessed moment from the past seeking out prosciutto di parma.

Order pan con Serrano (Serrano ham sandwich) and a cana (a small, ice cold beer served in a glass) as you belly up to the bar. Savor the jam, enjoy the show and rest assured that you’re experiencing a truly authentic Madrid moment.